My daughter is so negative—how do I fix it?
An anonymous parent wrote to me a few weeks ago. She said every time she picks up her daughter from work or school, her daughter would complain about her job, coworkers, or even her friends at school. It was a constant barrage of insults, complaints, and criticism. This mom was concerned because her daughter does claim to be a Christian. I suggested that before her daughter could say anything say, “Give me two positive things about work or school.” Then, ask her details about those things. Now, if she starts talking negatively about work, friends, or coworkers, remind her what Ephesians says about building people up. As we point our kids to Scripture, it will have a positive impact.
I just don’t know what to do anymore!
That’s a hard place to be as we raise our kids. Have you been there? I have. If you’re a single parent, where do you turn? John is a friend of Parent Minute and wisely says, “Every parent needs to feel appreciated, encouraged, and supported by either their spouse or other parents.” Why is this important? Well, when we get to those, “I-just-don’t-know-what-to-do” moments, we have somewhere to turn for advice. Now for me, I turned to my dad who always had great advice or provided assurance that I was on the right track. Now, if you don’t have that, find somebody at church who could be that person for you. It won’t only help your parenting but will give you a trusted praying friend.
I hate what the culture is doing to my kids
Cohabitation, abortion, homosexuality, selfishness—the world calls them normal. How do we teach our kids to reject these without sounding hateful? First—ground them in truth. God’s Word is clear. Sin separates us from Him. But second—teach them to love people, not approve sin. Jesus ate with sinners but never excused sin. Third—be real. Kids need to know why God’s way is best. Romans 12:2 says, “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.” Help them see that living for Jesus isn’t about rules—it’s about redemption and being thankful for the great gift of salvation by grace, through faith, in Christ alone.
What is the Gospel?
Parents, teaching your kids the gospel is the most important thing you’ll ever do. It’s not the church’s job—it’s yours. Don’t overthink it. Keep it simple and clear. Here’s the truth: we’re all sinners. We’ve all broken God’s law. And because of that, we need a Savior. That Savior is Jesus. He died on the cross for our sins, was buried, and rose again. His blood was shed for us. And His gift of salvation is available to anyone who believes. Romans 10:9 says, “If you confess with your mouth, ‘Jesus is Lord,’ and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.” Tell your kids that truth—often.
One excels, the other doesn’t!
One kid is the star athlete—the other, not so much. How do you celebrate one without discouraging the other? First, affirm their unique strengths—because God made them different for a reason! Maybe one dominates on the field, but the other has a gift for leadership, creativity, or compassion. Praise them both for their effort, not just results. 1 Corinthians 12 reminds us we are all different parts of the same body—each with a purpose. Colossians 3 tells us to do everything as for the Lord and not for men – we’re actually serving the Lord himself. Encourage teamwork, not comparison. Success isn’t just about winning—it’s about glorifying God in whatever we do.
How could my kids turn away from Christ?
Few things break a parent’s heart more than hearing, “I don’t believe in Jesus anymore.” So, what now? First—don’t panic. Salvation isn’t ours to give or grant. It’s between our kids and God. He is still in control. Second—keep the door open. Be a good place for honest conversations. Don’t get heated. Tempers lost just slam those doors. Don’t shame them—listen. Third—pray. God’s love pursues. He’s not done with them. Luke 15 tells the story of the prodigal son. The father never stopped loving, never stopped hoping, never stopped waiting. That’s our call too. Keep trusting. Keep loving. God is still writing their story.
I’m not sure moving home is gonna be good
Your adult child has walked away from Christ—and now they’re moving back in. Different values, different choices—what do you do? First, set clear expectations—your home, your rules. If they’re under your roof, respect goes both ways. Second, love them as Christ loves us—not with judgment, but with grace and truth. Pray for them daily. Show them what it means to follow Jesus—not by forcing faith, but by living it out. 1 Peter 3:15 says, “But in your hearts honor Christ the Lord as holy, always being prepared to make a defense… yet do it with gentleness and respect.” Keep planting seeds. God is still at work.
Should I admit that I sinned to my kids?
Yes! Absolutely! Aaron is a pastor and says, “A parent should repent to their kids.” He’s right. As my wife and I were raising our kids, we made our share of mistakes. In disciplining our kids, I came to realize that when I confessed my sins to my kids, they were more prone to confess theirs. Aaron says, “A lot of Christian kids grow up knowing that their parents are sinners, but never hear their parents confess it.” If we appear holier than our kids and above wrong, it’ll push them away—perhaps preventing them for seeing their need of a Savior. Aaron adds, “One of the best ways to teach our children the gospel is to show them our need for it.” Great words, Aaron.
It’s a free country. I can say what I want!
Can you? While the First Amendment to the United States Constitution guarantees free speech, I guarantee you that if you say something publicly using negative words to describe a race or social behavior, you’ll quickly realize that is TRUE, but you’ll also suffer the consequences of what you say. How do we help our kids use wise words when speaking? Well, there isn’t one easy lesson, but those lessons are laced throughout the Bible. Proverbs 21:23 says, “Whoever keeps his mouth and his tongue keeps himself out of trouble” (ESV). In other places, it warns us not to use corrupt, filthy, or foolish talk. Instead, it encourages gentle, gracious, and encouraging words. Parents, are we leading by example?
I don’t want my kids to be stingy
Do your kids see generosity as an obligation or an opportunity? The Bible makes it clear—generosity isn’t just a good deed; it’s a way to reflect Christ. 2 Corinthians 9:7 says: “Each of you should give what you have decided in your heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver.” That means we give not out of guilt, but out of gratitude. Whether it’s money, time, or talents, our kids need to see us living open-handedly. Because in God’s economy, giving isn’t losing—it’s gaining. Jesus said, “It is more blessed to give than to receive.” Let’s teach our kids to experience the joy of generosity. It really is contagious and biblical.